One simple complicated framework that changed my life.
I’ve always wondered how people were great with money and achieved goals with modest salaries at a young age. Then I was introduced to the power of investing and multiplying your wealth, I wanted that gumption and tenacity but I soon understood it wasn’t JUST investing. I saw young people make money, have a balanced family life, even do yoga and make art. HOW?
What was it? Were they praying to god more than I did? Were they atheists? Were they more compassionate or were they just blessed?
..or did they just PRIORITIZE better? I kept stalking them. Sounds crazy, yes I did. I wanted to look like them, think like them, and talk like them. I set fancy goals, followed a wild ‘follow your heart methodology’, did the tasks, and achieved the objectives. Yet, despite this brilliant advice I regularly faile with my goals or end up unhappy with my achievements despite nailing them.
Sooner or later, I realized it wasn’t my lack of motivation. It was my wrong choice of goals that caused this time and again. I remember my mother teaching my 15-year-old self, the difference between three words explicitly — needs, wants, desires. I didn’t absorb much of the analogy then but these three words somehow stayed with me in the most hollow form. Through time, excessive reading and pondering, I happened to stumble over Eisenhower’s matrix — it made me feel intelligent and it was driven by history so I gave it a read and found an intersection with my childhood. How? We’ll come to that in a bit.
“Who can define for us with accuracy the difference between the long and short term! Especially whenever our affairs seem to be in crisis, we are almost compelled to give our first attention to the urgent present rather than to the important future.”
— Dwight D. Eisenhower, 1961 address to the Century Association
Dwight D. Eisenhower — was a general during World War II and the 34th president of the United States. In a 1954 speech, Eisenhower quoted, “I have two kinds of problems, the urgent and the important. The urgent are not important, and the important are never urgent.”
This led to the birth of a very important theory that helped adapt my goals, recognize their importance, or upgrade them to make their realization inevitable.
Urgent tasks in this matrix require utmost attention and action, these tasks put you into execution mode and make you occupied.
Important tasks in this matrix contribute to your long-term goals and are usually not urgent in the very instant. These goals however are the sweet spot. Items here meet the qualifications of being something that you actually need for psychological, emotional, physical, or financial stability.
This framework works very well to a large extent and it promptly directs you to the best tasks for your success, long-term goals, and your well-being. While the urgency of the circumstance is fairly easy to spot, the importance is far more elusive. The outcome as a result, is a decent measure but the exact result of the activities cannot be determined quite necessarily. Success and well-being are both measured very subjectively, hence this should be applied to the importance of your goals.
Obvious question? HOW
I designed a homemade tool based on my mother’s teachings — NEEDS, WANTS, AND DESIRES. Cracked it a few years too late, but I did. The only way my millennial brain would understand this concept was probably using emojis, so I did the needful.
My mother always taught me to evaluate, like all Indian mothers. Decisions, people, films, food to recognize the level of that thing’s importance to my life. As a result, I unknowingly developed feelings, preferences, likes, and dislikes which brought me close to my immediate goals.
Will this pair of AirPods benefit my long call hours in the long term or I could do with the legacy wired earphones. Is it a fad or does it require my attention? Can I live without noise cancellation or hand gestures? Is it absolutely necessary? I evaluated every single thing. In true designer fashion, I also tried fitting it into the bottom block of Maslow’s hierarchy of needs, if the shoe fit — the prince would find the princess. If not, it is a temporary urge.
With every want, comes an attached price (always). Was I ready to pay the price? Did I want it bad enough or did I want it because my friends had it?
And based on my hypothesis, I put my goals in the need want matrix accordingly. The desires were in my fourth quadrant — I didn’t eliminate the obvious items in the section, I upgraded it to rewards every once in a while. Indulgence is the law of nature.
I also streamlined my matrix into a few supporting factors, made a nice Venn diagram in my head sounds complex but hang with me, please?
Energy, focus, and avoidance (please imagine three rings intersecting)
If I ever needed anything that should require more focus and energy, especially out of the few things I thought I wanted but actually didn't want, ties back to the earlier point I mentioned about price. Everything comes at a price. If there was no real emotional or practical trigger, it was almost instantly a NADA.
Then came in avoidance, so I didn't default out of turn. Desires are called so for a reason, they’re easy to fall for. This could easily help me recognize, things I absolutely both wanted and needed more and more.
I’ve been following this matrix as a mental model for a while, and looking at people investing in crypto while they’re also doing hot yoga is daunting, but maybe they’re prioritizing better? Give people the benefit of doubt always.
I’ve made efforts to construct and reconstruct my life enough to be even able to share this. The above techniques work well and they’re simple but they’re complex. You need to figure. Why do you need that Spotify subscription? Why do you need instant coffee when everyone else is brewing it? Do you need a credit card? Do you want to join a yoga class? Do you need a vacation or want one? The choice you’re resisting is more often than not the correct answer.